Some food smells so amazing that I would gladly wear it as perfume. A quick internet search quickly revealed that, fruit aside, food perfume is not actually a thing.

But it should be. Eau du fresh baked bread

Imagine how many compliments you would get if you smelled like movie popcorn! How many dates would you have gotten if you smelled like frying bacon?

But of course this could be used for evil. Going to your job review with your emotionally vulnerable boss while smelling like a Thanksgiving turkey could hit just the right buttons on the sentimentality machine to make that new promotion belong more to the bird than to your awesome work.

And I suppose there would be drawbacks. Riding a bus smelling like Grandma’s cookies might make it feel a little more crowded than it really is.


Ok.Β Maybe there is good reason to not have food scented perfume. But I still maintain that if I could, I would smell like hamburgers on theΒ grill.